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Zenith weapon tests started in Chile

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Skasi
US spying agency NASA today confirmed the existance of what they describe to be a "[..] meteor controller capable of manipulating the orbit of celestial bodies (see Near-Earth objects) on a scale much larger than what generic rocket engines of our time could achieve.", adding that "although moving the area of impact north or south will be impossible due to reliance on Earth's orbital direction [..] timing as well as east-west accuracy are hampered by Earth rotation, this device would have the means to bombard Earth in the near future".



Source: http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap131201.html


Update: Additional investigation by inspectors of the National Armageddon Spying Agency (NASA) just recently revealed further facts about this construction. According to an official report it is the first successful attemt at controlling weather on a grand scale.

+8 / -0
10 years ago
Zenith? it sucks...you make shields and you win. I want to see DISCO:D
+2 / -0
Very nice Skasi. I'm interested to see who'll fail.
+0 / -0
10 years ago
At least cloack is already here:D. +1 for the hiden snipers

+0 / -0
10 years ago
And we haz shields to:D

+0 / -0
10 years ago
The 'Very Large Telescope'? Really? Someone needs to teach these astronomers how to name things.
+1 / -0
Oh boy, you'd be surprised:

http://xkcd.com/1294/

Look up the ticked names if you don't believe it.
+3 / -0
Skasi
NLrankBlackdutchie: (start at 35:10 in case the anchor doesn't work)
+0 / -0
10 years ago
If you read the article carefully, it talks about creating artificial stars in the upper atmosphere. Clearly, the zenith thing is a red herring, to distract us from the true nature of the coming Period of Heavy Bombardment.
+0 / -0
10 years ago
How about:
* Armageddon (What extinguished dinosaurier)
* Death Beam (To make unwanted reporters appear crazy)
* Meteor Controller (Zenit's name in the game "Earth 2150")

^ Just BTW: Don't take this too serious ^
+0 / -0
I think "artificial star" is a bad term that leads to confusion for layman. More about this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lidar and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laser_guide_star
+2 / -0
10 years ago
We neeeeddzzzzz newtons
+0 / -0
FIrankFFC
10 years ago
we need fleas
+0 / -0
Skasi
Important update!
After the military organisation NASA aimed their laser at Mars, extraterrestrial beings began to strike back and fired a green laser at Earth. It is believed that this beam is transmitting a highly contagious disease. Experts strongly recommend that residents do not to consume ice cream until further notice. Furthermore green-eyed humans are well advised to turn themselves in to the local police for they might have been brainwashed and turned into alien spies. I too will turn myself in after this post!



Source: http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap140418.html
+1 / -0